I find myself sitting today thinking about my children. Grateful is probably too small a word for how I feel about the blessing of having them in my life. There’s not a day that goes by when they are brought to my mind that I don’t want to stop and smile, laugh, or pray.

It’s hard to imagine but for the last 23 years I have had the privilege of being called mom. When I was 23 and having my daughter, I don’t think I could have imagined even half of what it has meant to me to be her mother and to be mother to my other children. I vividly remember holding my oldest in my arms the first time and realizing that my whole entire life had changed because the entire focus of my life shifted. It wasn’t about me anymore I knew it would be about her. I also knew that that would never change. Sure, I was thankful for her then but my thankfulness for my daughter has grown immensely through the years. And not just for my oldest child but for every single one of my children. It always felt the same meeting each one of them. 

Each of them coming into my life changed me in ways that I probably will never understand because I can’t imagine my life without them.  Each one of them so very unique and special and mine. Nothing can take that away from me.  I will always hold the memories I’ve made and the moments we’ve shared. For each and every one I’m so very grateful.

First, I’m thankful for the challenges that they brought to my life. Now I know that this wouldn’t seem like something to be thankful for, but it is. Life would be very boring without the many varied experiences and trials that my children have brought into it. Times such as when they were young and I was trying to figure out how to get them to sleep better, make safe choices, learn, and grow successfully in school. Just generally the struggle to keep them alive and healthy was a challenge and still is. There wasn’t a day that there was not some problem to solve, giant to defeat, behavior to temper, love to offer, or lesson to teach. Due to the fact that I had four children the challenges were multiplied.  Still I thank God for the challenges that they brought into my life because the challenges represent all the growth that they’ve experienced and that I’ve experienced through them over the years.

They’ve taught me to be unselfish and attentive. They’ve taught me to be proactive and to not be intimidated when things don’t go just right. They’ve taught me that I can bear any moment when I bear it with those I love. For the times they intentionally challenged me and for those when life was just challenging for them, and I had to face it alongside of them I am truly grateful. We are all better for it.

In addition to being thankful for the challenges, I’m thankful for the motivation that they provide. They didn’t ask to be brought into this world. I didn’t even plan to bring them into this world honestly, not intentionally. God brought each of them into my life. They don’t owe me anything for being brought here. Instead, I owe them. I owe them in the way that I need to be to them. They need me to be a mother who is an example and a mentor. They need me to be a mother who is a wise provider and caretaker. They need me to be a light and an encouragement in an often-discouraging world. Knowing that they need me and that they depend on me has become a great source of motivation for me. When I was going through some of my darkest moments, I knew that I couldn’t quit or give in to despair because if my ship sank, I had four other souls on board that would go down with me. I wouldn’t be the only one affected by my demise. So, I fought harder when I didn’t have the strength even to fight for myself. I kept bailing water out of my sinking ship because I loved my children, and they motivated me. So, for that constant source of motivation that pushes me to be the best version of myself that I can be I’m so thankful. 

I’m so very grateful also for the memories. Memories are really all that we hold, all that we actually have in this life. They’re the only tangible intangible thing that exist. We can bring them to mind in moments of despair, we can relive them and feel the same joy and love. Memories are powerful. My children have given me many. Mostly good, some amazing, and even the ones that are hard to remember I’m thankful for. Because every memory represents a moment. A moment that I was blessed to have them.

I’m thankful for their loving eyes that see me in a way that I do not and can not see myself. When I would look and criticize myself for how I appear they tell me I’m beautiful. When I would dismiss my efforts as weak or inefficient they seem to marvel at everything I do. They once told me they thought I was Wonder Woman, I thought they must be crazy because there’s no superhero part of me, not that I see in myself. Yet through their eyes of love for me, I’m their hero, their wonder woman. I’m so grateful. It gives me the opportunity if I look through their eyes to see that maybe I am a woman of worth because I’m theirs. Because I’m their mother, I matter to them in a way that no one else will. What a gift! It’s not one I ever want to take for granted. I’m full of gratitude that they can see me with eyes of such love and with such grace. 

As the years have passed, I find myself grateful more and more when it comes to my children. They are truly the best parts of me. The best decision I’ve ever made, my greatest accomplishment and achievement has been loving them.  I’ve regretted things in my life, but I’ve never once regretted them. It is my sincerest prayer and hope that they never regret that God gave them to me. I will spend every day working to be a mother to them that I know they deserve.

So, this Mother’s Day as they reach out and thank me for being a mom. I want to reach out and thank them for being my children. For the blessing and the challenges that they have brought to my life.  For being the motivation that they give me to keep enduring no matter what. For the many memories and moments that we’ve shared and hold together. Finally,  for the amazing loving and gracious way that they see me. For these things I am truly grateful, for my children I am overwhelmed with gratitude! 

I am truly a woman blessed to be called mother to my kids! I love you more than you could ever imagine, only surpassed by God’s love for you! So, if you want to give me something this Mother’s Day receive the message of my love to you and hold on to it forever.