Devotions For Real Life

I recently wrote about self-reflection. Essentially the importance of going to the Lord and asking him to test us, try us, and see if there is an area of our lives that we need him to change, to lay aside our excuses and be transformed. There are a few points of clarification though that I need to make.

First, I want to talk about the why? Why do we self-reflect? We self-reflect to identify areas of imbalance in our lives, of sin, and to identify areas of our lives that are holding us back. This does not mean that we are looking for ways to condemn ourselves. We are free from condemnation in Christ Jesus, we are already forgiven for all the things that are failings or weaknesses. God understands and he loves us still. We just don’t want to stay in that old pattern. Remember, don’t be conformed to the pattern of the world but be renewed and transformed. After all, Christ has freed us so we can walk in freedom.

It’s important to remember that the things in our lives that were chains on us, he died to break off of us. He has already broken them off of you. Why then would you pick them back up and carry them around? If the prison doors have been opened, why would you stay in the cell? Wouldn’t you want to look around and realize the freedom you have already been given and walk into it? It’s easier said than done. We are more familiar with our chains and excuses, it’s easier to stay in them as it requires no change, transformation, or any effort. It can be scary stepping into the unknown even if the unknown is freedom. The whole devil that you know idea, is better than the one you don’t. You’re used to imprisonment, therefore you stay there. I challenge you to ask yourself if this is how you should live? God forbid! He has given us wings of hope and faith and love, we should fly free.

Taking it a step further, he did not free us to keep looking back at where we left either. We don’t walk out of the cell and turn around and stare at it in contemplation forever. No, we leave it behind, turn away from it completely, move forward and away from it. Leaving all of it behind with its chains and any reminder of its shame. The point is, self-reflection is not intended for wallowing in the past or even in today’s failings and struggles.

What do we do then? If staying stuck is the wrong path, and looking back is the wrong choice, what is the right way to self-reflect? We go to God, we ask him to reveal to us the things in our lives that need transformation. Then you go to him again in prayer for wisdom and freedom from whatever you are struggling with. You need wisdom to know what actions you can take to reset the negative patterns of your life. This is the courage part of the serenity prayer. The place where you begin, and you lean into the Lord to guide you.  You continue to allow him to cleanse you and to set you free from the things that have held you back before. This is where you forgive yourself and others if there is any need for that resolution. You act and you set a new pattern for living. You follow God’s instructions, and you walk in the freedom he has given.  You lay down the chains, leave the cell, and don’t look back. Follow the new path and the new way that God has laid out for you. 

I know what you’re thinking, this is much easier said than done. Yet if you miss this step, then self-reflection changes from a freedom giving thing into another kind of prison. Have you ever seen people trapped in guilt, still pacing the cell with open doors and chains broken off yet not free? Or perhaps they’re standing on the outside of the cell but they’re just looking back in, stuck in the past. Self-Reflection done badly is a new kind of trap. Control is being given to the old way, to the issues because it is where your focus is. They become consumed with the thing they were imprisoned by thereby it becomes for them a new kind of prison. If we’re not supposed to get lost in contemplation of the issues , where should our focus be? We need to look up, look to Christ. What does an orchestra member do?  Where do the instrumentalist look for direction? They keep their eyes on the conductor. Who is our conductor as a believer? God himself.  How can God guide you and reveal wisdom you need if you are not looking at him? I have heard other people say “stop looking at the giant” (and some issues do seem gigantic even insurmountable) but instead look to the God who can slay the giants through you, through your faith and actions.

The giant was defeated because David believed, because of his faith. His faith gave him courage to face Goliath and ultimately to win. We too like David once we see the giant, can have the confidence that the victory is ours, that the freedom is there for the taking, and that through faith and action – doing what wisdom shows in keeping our eyes focus the whole time on God- we can find true transformation. God will help our unbelief, he will be strength in our weaknesses, and he will do the impossible in you and through you. Look to God for the freedom and direction that you need.

Self-reflection makes us aware of the issues, the giants if you will, but this step is quickly moved past to faith and action. That is where the Holy Spirit transforms us.  It’s where the work of transformation is made real.

Still one question remains when it comes to self-reflection. When and how often do we need to self-reflect? Do we just ask God only once to reveal the areas to us that need transformation, or maybe we just ask when we’re saved initially? After our initial salvation experience are we all good to go as believers for the rest of our Christian life, already complete and totally transformed?

This is where many believers stop, and they lose the fullness of God’s freedom because of it. It’s not just a one-shot deal or a one-time thing. We should self-reflect often. In life there are so many seasons. We can be on track and easily get off track. Maybe for a while we listen to our own wisdom and find ourselves in a place that we never imagined we’d be. The momentum of life can pull us off track. So, what do we do? Like the orchestra looks at the conductor often, keep your eyes on him, he can help you to keep to the path or to get back to it if you’ve wandered away. It’s also good to note that when we ask, we need to accept his answer. When he reveals an area needing transformation, we have to be willing to be transformed and lay aside our excuses. We can’t stick our fingers in our ears and close our eyes because we don’t want to hear or see God’s guidance. Just because we don’t like his answer, doesn’t mean it not right or true. Don’t deny it, we have all done it in our spiritual life. 

I fully realize that you wanted the instant transformation, but that’s just not the way it is. We are onions with layers, maybe you didn’t realize that something was an issue or an area of concern in your heart and life, till you’ve got to that layer. That’s why self-reflection is not just one and done. Think of it this way, you go back to the doctor for regular screenings, right? It is the same for believers and self-reflection. Remember, it’s God’s work to transform, we just have to listen, follow, and be open to what God wants or needs to work in us. We know he has already won, so we can face the giants with confidence, or life struggles with boldness because we know that we are not alone. He is not just faithful to save us initially or just once. He is faithful to sustain us and complete the work of transformation in us! How amazing is his grace and his faithfulness to us!

So try it – Self-reflect the right way – with focus on Jesus, move from issue to resolution, to ultimate freedom, and then rinse and repeat. Your whole life – that’s all. Just think how amazing the finished work of Christ will be in you!

Scriptures: Romans 12:2, Isaiah 43:18-19, Phil. 3:13-14, Ephesians 4:23-24, Galatians 5:1, Matt. 7:24

I was talking with my friend the other day. I’m not sure why I did it, but I began to question him. I called him out on a certain behavior or choice he had been making. He responded defensively with an explanation as to why he made that choice. This would normally be where I would have ended that portion of the conversation, but not that day. I’m still not sure why I pushed but I did. I pushed on and brought up that the same choice was made by him previously another time. I explained that the excuse he was using was inaccurate because this was not a new thing. Just for some background, things have changed, different staff was now in place. I pointed out that his behavior and choice was the same prior to the transition to the new staff, so that could not be the true reason he was making the choice he was making. I didn’t stop there, I dug even deeper and persisted with my questioning. I brought up that in a completely different setting, I noticed the same choice or behavior was being made. His excuse didn’t pan out and I wanted him to see that. 

He looked a bit taken aback at my perception, so I explained that I understood there may be a reason for the choice he was making but it was not the excuse that he was giving me. I think I was trying to help him connect the dots and I realized that I wanted him to move towards self-reflection instead of just accepting the status quo. I wanted this for my friend because I thought he was in denial and needed to consider his true reasons. Was this my job to point this out to my friend? Probably not, but that was how it played out that day. Yes, we’re still friends, I think true friends should tell each other truths even when they’re not always easy to share or hear. 

Later on, I sat contemplating what had occurred between my friend and I. I realized that my motivation was wanting him to be honest with himself.  I had observed him doing something all of us do regularly. We make excuses so that we don’t have to face the root of the issue. We excuse our behavior and our choices, so we do not have to examine any deeper, potentially getting to the heart of the matter and actually find resolution. We don’t really want to ask ourselves the real reason behind our choices and we don’t want to self-reflect, even if it would mean living a better way. Excuses are our shield against real change, and unfortunately, they get in the way of true freedom from our hang ups. I do it, and I know you have done it because it’s what we do as humans. We sidestep, we deflect, we rationalize, and we excuse. It is human nature. Yet we don’t have to let our human nature win here, there is another way.

Just for clarification, an excuse and a reason are different. A paralytic can’t walk, why? The reason is that they are paralyzed. I argue that reasons are unchangeable things, things that are out of our control and ability to change. Now we have assistance to help deal with our limitations, or reasons. A paralytic can use a wheelchair to help them be more mobile. I use glasses because I have bad eyesight. It is not an excuse it is a reason. So there is a difference between an excuse and a reason. What does the serenity prayer say “God give me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change (my reasons), the courage to change the things I can(my excuses), and the Wisdom to know the difference.” Here is where the self-reflection comes in, the wisdom to know the difference.

In Psalms 139 it says “Search me oh God and know my heart, test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me and lead me in the way everlasting.” We know that as a believers we go to the Lord to praise him, and to ask him to meet the needs of ourselves and others. I argue that there is something more we need to go to God about. Search me, Lord. Self-reflect, examine your heart and truly see.  We should go to him with an open heart and ask him to do his work in us. How does God respond when we ask him to search us? It simple, he searches us. So be honest with yourself about the things that need to change, things that are true issues. Why should you do this? We should want to deal with something that is a true issue, because it will end up causing problems and limit us in our life.

I’m not sure of the numbers or the exact statistics but I know that if you discover cancer in the early stages, you have a much greater chance of survival then if you find it at stage four. Issues do not shrink when they are ignored either in your spirit or in your body. No, instead they grow larger. Perhaps it won’t kill you, but it can set you in unhealthy patterns that repeat over and over in your life. At what point do we finally make it a priority to determine the true cause of our weaknesses, and to identify the areas of vulnerability within ourselves?

You are lying to yourself if you don’t believe that you have any issues, struggles, or excuses you are holding on to. We all can be better than we are and we all can afford to change. None of us are perfect like Christ. So, this honest self-reflection needs to be a part of every believer’s life. This is a truth, and it’s a hard truth, one that we all want to avoid. But how can we?

Some believers may argue that self-reflection is not mandated by God, or is it? Romans 12:2 says “do not be conformed to this world but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God. What is good and acceptable and perfect.” Second Corinthians 13:5 says “Examine yourselves, to see whether you are in the faith. Test yourself. Or do you not realize this about yourselves, that Christ is in you, unless indeed you fail to meet the test.” Also, in Matthew Jesus said that you see a twig in your brother’s eye but there is a log in your own. What can we garner from Christ’s words? That it’s time to stop worrying about that which is within your brother’s eye (spend your life judging others) and be more concerned if there’s a log in your own. Take a look at your own reflection and self-reflect. It is time to be honest with yourself, to lay excuses aside, and to ask Christ to reveal to you the real issues, the root of the problem.

Why? Can’t we just ignore it and act like it’s not there? I hope the reason is clear now, it’s the path towards true freedom, true healing – that’s what true honest self-reflection is. We say that we really want Christ to change us, we really want to be more like him, but are we running from it? 

Let’s do this a better way, pray the serenity prayer, and ask God to search you.  Be ready, he will search you, he will change you if you let him, he will heal you, and you will finally find true freedom! It’s all about freedom! Let Christ truly set you free, reflect and be open to change that leads to balance, that leads to healing and yes freedom. It all starts with being willing to take an honest look at yourself, your life, your motives, your excuses, and your actions.  Are you willing to try it and self-reflect? Aren’t you ready to see real change and be free from your excuses? Try it, even if it’s uncomfortable or scary, you will not regret it.  The only thing you will regret, is knowing this but doing nothing.  It’s your choice to make, your freedom to gain or lose.  What will you decide?  

Scripture: Psalms 139:23-24, Jeremiah 17:10, Psalms 139, Romans 12:12, 2 Cor. 13:5